Wednesday, June 21, 2006

For the 2nd 10th 100th 1000th time

I spent some time going through Nova's things tonight. His clothes and blankets and stuff. I'm keeping everything that was with him at the hospital, and a few outfits, and the rest is packed up. I guess I'll sell all of that and donate it. I got the crib partially disassembled when I hit overload and just quit.

You realize he spent nearly half of his life in the hospital? The first 2 weeks and the last 6. 58 days of the 125 he lived. He never even outgrew the size 0-3 sleepers. He never had a pair of shoes on his feet, they were too big. I have 2 bottles of baby powder that I never opened.

I'm already forgetting what he looked like and I can't remember the sound of his cry. I'm losing him all over again.

6 comments:

  1. Oh ERIN!

    ((((HUGS ERIN)))

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  2. Bless your heart.

    Tear, hug, and love, Lori

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  3. I'm writing this through tears. You're in my thoughts and prayers today, as always.
    Much love,
    Gretchen

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  4. Hugs, hugs, hugs, Erin. Wish I had more to offer than tears & a drippy nose & hugs.

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  5. E, I wish my arms could reach that far.

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  6. Oh, Erin. So hard what you're going through, but thank you for writing the emotions down. It's so raw and real, and a strong reminder for me to never take a moment forgranted with our kids.
    God bless sweet little Nova. I know you remember his cry. You just had a moment of hot grief to work through while putting away his things.
    So sorry for your pain, Erin. I really am.

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