I got an email yesterday from Shaela. She apologized for all the past crap and offered to make things right by sending me the books I'd ordered before. Actually, she'd already corrected some mistakes in them and asked if I was still interested in them because she was expecting the proofs, and wanted to fill the order I'd made.
As for past crap, I don't have the energy to dwell on it. I have much more pressing things to dwell on. And the books, well, why not? I mean, the worst that can happen is that I never get them, and that's pretty much where I was before I got her mail, so it isn't like I have anything to lose right?
So, I might have more chapbooks in stock soon. I hope I do - the whole fiasco broke my heart. I know the chapbook is far from great, because I had no idea what I was doing to be honest. But it meant a lot to me anyway, and to have it all go to shit the way it did just hurt my feelings. Yeah, I know, I should be able to be more objective and detached from my work, but I haven't been able to manage that very well with Poetic Acceptance.
6 months ago, I'd have said something silly like "I love it like one of my children!" which sounds pretty silly now, but it did have a special place in my heart. Probably the only thing, aside from my children, that I've ever really accomplished. I'd like to think that it could at least fade into nothingness like most chapbooks do, rather than ending the way it did.
Anyway, I'm a little wary, mostly in self-defense lol. Just don't want to get hurt again. Ha, now I sound like a jilted lover. Shut up Erin...