You know that movie "Groundhog Day?" That's what grief is like. You have to do the same thing over and over. You get through one day only to wake up and realize that you have to do it all again. You think you're tired of hearing me go on and on about Nova? Try living it.
And today is such a perfect day to feel the way I feel today. It's wet and bleak - raining without storming, light but not bright, just grey and crappy and long. These are the days I fight the urge to go the hell back to bed.
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ReplyDeletethinking of you.
ReplyDeleteYes honey, I know exactly what you mean. On the flip side though, sometimes doing the same thing over and over is what helps us heal not what makes it stay raw. It works both ways babe. Some days, more than others.
ReplyDeleteI equate that exact movie with husbands affair and the almost demise of our marriage. We saw that movie the night we decided to not get divorced and instead work it out. It's bittersweet to me. The trigger for me is that both of mine were on holidays. The whole freaking damn country celebrates my baby's death with a huge ass firworks display. How's that for a fun fourth? The other was April Fool's day...what a bitter joke life played on me that year.
If you're goin' through hell...keep on going, you might get out before the devil even knows you're there...
Keep on moving babe. Even if it's the same movement as yesterday.
hugs,
magdala~
I am never tired of hearing you talk about Nova.
ReplyDeleteWe so want to help each other through the dark.
ReplyDeleteExtend a hand.
Ease your beautiful soul, hurting soul, precious woman.