Monday, July 25, 2005

Leave Me Not

Leave Me Not

In the crab-grass tangles beneath the bloomless azalea,
crickets play graveled violins. Rasping concertos weave

through strings of a gibbous moon, pale - and wind turns
in conch shell pirouettes. But tip-toed seduction

is for the love-struck. I am not aroused by the waifish
clouds or midnight dust devils dancing on point.

Tangle me instead in kudzu, bold and twisted, gnaw me
with relentless vines and sunshine. Wrap me in thunder,

drown me in lightning - as storm soaked wisteria climbs.
Lay me on the raw earth; roll me in mud and puddles.

And when you go, leave me - not with starlight,
but with grass-stains to remember you by.

This one needs a new title.


  1. hello I really like some of these words of yours. Sent you an invite to join some other people at

    do join us

    best wishes

  2. grass-stain memories?

  3. grass-stain memories to remember you by?
    sounds redundant.

    And just grass-stained memories lacks flow, and the visual impact of a line that vastly different in length than the others would be distracting...

  4. I meant as a title...

  5. I really like this one, E. My only nit is the spacing of the lines. Looks too much like you double-spaced it in some word processing program. Maybe that was the point - to appear loose - but I think it weakens the visual impact a bit. I would also consider a semi-colon after "bold and twisted." Two commas in that line make it seem a bit run-on.

    Other than my little obsessive compulsive observations, I like this a lot. :o)