| My Peculiar Aristocratic Title is: |
Reverend Lady Erin the Charitable of Yockenthwait Walden
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I am Inherently Selfish
Are you lucky enough to have those days when you look at your life and think, "Yeah, this is right, this all makes sense...?" Believe it or not, I have a lot of them. I figure people probably look at me with pity and assume that I'm lost and that my universe and everything in it has gone insane. Some days, a lot of days, I agree with them. But despite the insanity of my experiences, I'm generally at peace with the circumstances of my life. That's not to say I understand them or that I can even make sense of them, but I do accept them, and my own inability to truly comprehend a purpose, assuming there is one.
A huge part of making peace with it all is to make my own purpose for what has happened (and maybe that is the purpose?) I try to find balance. For all the sadness, I try to find something happy. For all the dark places, I try to find light. I do things to fill the void.
But grief is inherently selfish, and mine is no different... I do what I do because I need to. Because, as Rosie would say, it is my yellow. So, thank you all who have said how awesome it was for me to do something for the family whose Christmas was stolen... just be aware that while it may look like I'm out trying to save the world, in truth, sometimes, I'm just trying to save myself.