12/25/05 I had a 16 year old son, a 14 yr old son, an 11 yr old daughter, an 8 yr old son, a 2 yr old daughter and a son who was 23 days old. This year I have a 17 yr old son, a 15 yr old son, a 12 yr old daughter, a 9 yr old son and a 3 yr old daughter. Seems like a long list, right? Well, I can't seem to get past what's missing enough to appreciate what I still have.
My bank account is in the red, and I'm 2 weeks from Christmas with more than 1/2 my shopping left to do. My husband has gotten another job, in addition to running his own company. My oldest son hates his parents (and don't even fucking try to tell me how that's "normal" for his age ok? Just bite your tongue and back out.)
I'm pretty disinterested in everything and I'm sick as a dog - no doubt there's some connection between the physical and the mental there... but I don't really give a shit.
I'm walking the tight rope on the line between apathy and total meltdown. Teeeeter totter teeeter totter.