Let there be light, and there was light. God saw that the light was good, and he separated the light from the darkness.
Genesis 1:3-4
In the last few weeks we've been shoulder to shoulder with death. Cliche as it sounds, especially for the first week or so, I felt like there were three of us standing at Nova's bedside: me, Scott, and Death, staring at him, wondering who was going to win out in the end. The strange byproduct being that when you have something so dark constantly hanging over your shoulder, everything in front of you looks technicolor bright in contrast.
Today was no exception, it was a whole new shade of spring. The cherry trees are in full bloom - I have a bouquet on my kitchen table that is arguably the most gorgeous thing I have ever laid eyes on. The Bradford Pears are blooming too, thousands of cottonball blossoms that will soon fall as windswept snowflakes on grass that is a shade of green so fresh and vibrant that it hurts to look at it.
I am in love with life right now. In love with everything around me. Everything and everyone. And I appreciate all that I have and those that I know and love in a way that I never have before.
Maybe it sounds silly, but I just feel peaceful and happy today. Maybe it's spring fever, maybe it's exhaustion - maybe it's just that life is good, that my kids are beautiful, my friends are amazing, and my husband is the most wonderful man in town, and I am far luckier than anyone has a right to be.
*hug* let the light continue to shine, my dear. I feel it warming me and in knowing you are in a calmer place. Love you
ReplyDeleteI love the fact that you're feeling peaceful and happy, despite all the stuff going on around you. You NEED that more than anyone else I know. Sorry I haven't had a chance to comment as often as I'd like. I've read through the stuff about Tom, about Kassi (love the high alert with level black and blue!) BTW, it makes me so happy that I have a son! :) I've read every Nova post, several times over. I can't make it through the day without checking in on him, and I wish I could be there to hold his tiny little hand, too.
ReplyDeleteI don't think you should consider giving up your charity, E. I just think you'll regret it in major ways once life has settled a bit. If there's something admin-wise that you need help with, consider me your pro-bono employee. It's ok to put it on the back burner for a little while, and I have some other ideas, as well, which I will e-mail you, eventually. :)
Just wanted you to know that you're still being read, thought about, supported and loved from afar.
Hugs,
Angie
LOL
ReplyDeleteYou KNOW I'm happy when I quote scripture!
Ang~
What I need for my charity is people to order, lol. And you're right, I'll probably regret doing away with it, so I'll leave it alone for now, until I'm thinking straighter.
Admin-wise, it doesn't need a thing, it doesn't even need me ;)
I love you guys!
ML~
~E