tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10729800.post112174963944789024..comments2023-10-18T20:19:34.717-04:00Comments on Poetic Acceptance: Virginia in a BoxErinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06383001784323104995noreply@blogger.comBlogger12125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10729800.post-1156268083927404922006-08-22T13:34:00.000-04:002006-08-22T13:34:00.000-04:00are all of your poems here?I seem to remember not ...are all of your poems here?<BR/><BR/>I seem to remember not the name but a feeling of one you wrote a while back that blew me away. I read it on moontown. what was it?<BR/>sorry for being so vague.Sir James Eric Watkinshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08439184492064693110noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10729800.post-1121915047013850782005-07-20T23:04:00.000-04:002005-07-20T23:04:00.000-04:00Welp - this is it (I think) lol. Hope it doesn't d...Welp - this is it (I think) lol. Hope it doesn't disappoint!Erinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06383001784323104995noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10729800.post-1121868177120813762005-07-20T10:02:00.000-04:002005-07-20T10:02:00.000-04:00I had a parched throat after reading those first t...I had a parched throat after reading those first two stanzas. No suggestions here (I'm admittedly quite clueless when it comes to dissecting poems, even my own. Sigh.), just thirsty and waiting for the final version. ^_^S.L. Corsuahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10299376651709536034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10729800.post-1121844430752270182005-07-20T03:27:00.000-04:002005-07-20T03:27:00.000-04:00Does the play totally rock!? I bet it does. Glad y...Does the play totally rock!? I bet it does. Glad you wrote... I have been piddling since my last edit on this piece. I think I need to let it sit a while - give it time to come to me the way I want it to be.Erinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06383001784323104995noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10729800.post-1121834445542653512005-07-20T00:40:00.000-04:002005-07-20T00:40:00.000-04:00Nettinous said:actually like "dissected" more than...<A HREF="http://www.blogger.com/profile/6975632" REL="nofollow">Nettinous</A> said:<BR/><BR/>actually like "dissected" more than scattered. it's just that "is Virginia in a box" comes off old-sounding to me. To get around that, how about if the lover is trying to get into the box, to get open the box to pull out his beloved. "his Virginia in a box"--of course saying "his" woman is a little Erinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06383001784323104995noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10729800.post-1121834325403771862005-07-20T00:38:00.000-04:002005-07-20T00:38:00.000-04:00hmm, I think we both deleted your double post, and...hmm, I think we both deleted your double post, and ended up deleting them both :| Sorry!<BR/><BR/> I think I like Dissected better too... but I'm not all about having this guy try to save her... She's lost, and he's a memory. Yep, gotta work on this ending some more. Thanks Matt, for all your input, it's really been helpful!Erinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06383001784323104995noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10729800.post-1121824462518149902005-07-19T21:54:00.000-04:002005-07-19T21:54:00.000-04:00Matt, can I add you to my links over there -------...Matt, can I add you to my links over there -------->Erinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06383001784323104995noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10729800.post-1121822218941223562005-07-19T21:16:00.000-04:002005-07-19T21:16:00.000-04:00I do like the addition. Sorry my own idea sucked!...I do like the addition. Sorry my own idea sucked!Vickiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08573890783110046304noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10729800.post-1121809097953751472005-07-19T17:38:00.000-04:002005-07-19T17:38:00.000-04:00lol, that most definitely is not the face of a bal...lol, that most definitely is not the face of a ballerina. I'm gonna stick to my present theme, I just need to work out a kink or two in the ending :)Erinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06383001784323104995noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10729800.post-1121806411971410082005-07-19T16:53:00.000-04:002005-07-19T16:53:00.000-04:00Heh, the painting doesn't do much for me. What ab...Heh, the painting doesn't do much for me. What about something along the lines of a music box/jewelry box thing. Virginia could be the little ballerina that spins around to the music when the box is opened. Hey, I just got home so I'm not really in the mode yet....lolVickiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08573890783110046304noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10729800.post-1121805729162289152005-07-19T16:42:00.000-04:002005-07-19T16:42:00.000-04:00trumpeted eh? Now I've got "Puttin on the Ritz" ru...trumpeted eh? Now I've got "Puttin on the Ritz" running through my head! <BR/><BR/>I was hoping to come across with the feeling of her coming out of a mental haze, sort of a reawakening of sorts. <BR/><BR/>The line "Virginia in a Box" is required in the poem but this <A HREF="http://www.cafepress.com/americanpoet.26430226" REL="nofollow">box/painting</A> is also part of the inspiration. Have a Erinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06383001784323104995noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10729800.post-1121786890870044542005-07-19T11:28:00.000-04:002005-07-19T11:28:00.000-04:00hiya Matt-o!Point taken with dissected/is... disse...hiya Matt-o!<BR/><BR/>Point taken with dissected/is... dissected remind me of frogs in 9th grade anyway. <BR/><BR/>I'm thinking about "shadows play" too... I've only heard those 2 words together a few thousand times. <BR/><BR/>And I think I'm lacking something in the transition between S2 and S3 - and the ending is a flop.I think I'll need another between 2 and 3 for transition, and a better Erinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06383001784323104995noreply@blogger.com